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Co-parent Project 7
of 12 - make three
right re/marriage choices |
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What's
Unique About This Course?
A Comparison
of This Course
to Four Others
By Peter
K. Gerlach, MSW
Member
NSRC Experts Council
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The Web address of this article is
http://sfhelp.org/07/bhsf/compare.htm
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Use your browser's "back" button to return from the latter.
This practical
re/marriage-prep course differs in important ways
from four other courses for stepfamily co-parents. They are:
-
Drs.
Emily and John Visher's pioneering lay and Christian course
Stepping
Together,
-
the
8-part Stepfamily Association of America (SAA) course
Stepfamilies
Stepping Ahead, by Mala Burt, Patricia Papernow, and the
Vishers; and...
-
Rev. Ron
Deal's Christian audio/church course
Building a Successful
Stepfamily; and...
-
The multi-media "Smart Steps"
course (2002). This 12-hour research-based, educational program
is for remarried or partnering couples and their children, and
focuses on building couple and family strengths. The program uses
informational presentations, hands-on exercises, group discussions,
and several different media. The 250+ page Curriculum includes leader lesson-guides for
adult and child programs, background readings, hand-out masters, a
resource list, pre/post evaluation questionnaires, two videos (the movie
"Stepmom" and "Smart Steps Video Vignettes"), and a CD with PowerPoint
slides, hand-out files, and evaluation questionnaires. Order
this from the National Stepfamily
Resource Center (NSRC) for $150.00 + postage.
Two
useful pre-remarriage resources are not compared here
because they're couple strength-and-stressor evaluations, not courses:
Life
Innovations' Prepare Enrich MC (married with children),
and...
FOCCUS
- (Facilitating Open
Couple Communications,
Understanding, & Study)
However, the differences below apply to
their content span as well.
Course Goal
and Content Differences
Based on
29 years'
research, this Break the Cycle! course is specifically for courting
co-parents, and aims to prevent
re/divorce. Re/married
couples can still benefit from it if they made three wise re/wedding
choices. The other four courses are primarily for couples who have already
re/married. After reviewing these courses, I
find that none of them focus with any depth, as this course does, on raising
couples' awareness on...
-
Five widespread re/marital
and...
-
to help make informed re/marital choices. These seven include:
Assessing for and
psychological
from childhood
This work depends in part on co-parents
intentionally developing their non-denominational
awareness, and
encouraging it in their kids; and...
Building seven specific
based on reduced wounds
A unique feature of this Project is
encouraging co-parents to
below surface (secondary)
problems to identify and fill the
"beneath" them...
Affirming your stepfamily
and what it
and teaching this to
kin and supporters
(Project 3); and...
Converting up to 60 common stepfamily
myths into realistic
and relationship expectations, and teaching others about these
and...
Learning healthy-grieving
basics, assessing adults and
kids for
freeing any you find; and evolving a stepfamily
and...
Drafting a stepfamily
as the basis for
(a)
building a
and
drafting co-parent
to clarify responsibilities and reduce caregiving conflicts
and...
Each courting partner using their knowledge from
the six prior Projects to assess whether s/he is re/marrying the right
(partner + any kids, ex mates,
and kin); at the right
for the
right
-
This
Break the Cycle! course alerts couples to
they need to help each other with if they re/marry. The other
courses don't differentiate these five projects as fully or at all. This
course will help average co-parents learn to "pass" these four vital
Bottom
line: all five
courses aim to strengthen stepfamily relationships via a
series of facilitated interactive sessions. They emphasize different
topics, and vary significantly on content specifics.
This
course "goes deeper" than the others, and is the only one with many Internet links to an evolving array of
related worksheets, articles, and
other resources. Most of
these are now integrated in a series six guidebooks.
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Updated
September 12, 2008
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