Is it Depression or Grief?

        Treating "depression" is a multi-billion dollar American industry. Our media-dominated culture minimizes or ignores the primal human need to grieve the broken bonds we all form throughout our lives (losses). The concurrent multi-year processes of divorce and new-stepfamily mergers each cause adults and kids major clusters of invisible and physical losses. They each need to grieve these to regain inner-family balances and form new step-relationships (bonds).

        Many divorced people come from low-nurturance childhoods which often discouraged or even punished healthy grief. Therefore, many kids and adults in average divorcing families and stepfamilies have difficulty processing and accepting their many losses. Because the sadness phase of normal three-level mourning feels, looks, and sounds like "depression," many adults and kids are mis-diagnosed and use medication hoping to "cure" their symptoms. In many cases, the real cure is (a) assessing for false self wounds and blocked grief, and (b) using the ideas in co-parent Project 5 to build a pro-grief stepfamily environment, over time. Typical co-parents and their supporters are unaware of this, which silently promotes our U.S. re/divorce epidemic.

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