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- free your
true Self and reduce psychological wounds |
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Unsolicited
testimony about
Lesson 1 ("parts work")
Assess for
psychological wounds,
and
any you find. |
 The Web address of this article is
http://sfhelp.org/gwc/testimony.htm
The hilighting and links below are mine. Links will open a new
browser window or an informational popup, so
please turn off your
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From 31 years'
clinical experience and research, I propose that an epidemic,
little-known per-sonal and social
stressor is psychological
from a
("dysfunctional") childhood.
Therefore, the
of the
vital
Lessons
in this
Web site is devoted to
for and
these wounds and their toxic
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Lesson 1 differs from other personal-recovery
programs by proposing how to intentionally retrain and harmonize the
that comprise your
using
a technique
called
or "parts work."
I have heard
similar spontaneous comments like those below from many therapy clients, students, and
Website visitors since 1992.
-
Peter Gerlach, MSW
"Dear Pete -
I just wanted to thank you for the information on the
sfhelp.org website and share what it has done for me.
About a year ago a relationship I was in ended badly. I
had become to attached to her, had placed too much of my energy on her, and
when it ended I was very hurt. After a few weeks of rather severe
I had started asking a lot of questions about myself and doing a lot of
research on psycho-logy. I have long been diagnosed with
and most of my life have been rather moody. This has never been
severe enough to seriously affect my life, but it has left me enjoying life
less than I would like to.
In my search to improve my life, I discovered Buddhism and
systems I had never explored before. These things agreed with me and I
delved into the subject as a means to restore meaning and hope in my
life. The main message I got from all the reading I did was that the
secret was to get in touch with your
and learn to listen to
your
acknowledge them and learn what they had
to say, and then compassionately let them go.
While I agreed with this and had moderate success, I
found that all to often my thoughts and emo-tions would get carried away and
I could not maintain control. I became rather frustrated as I knew *what* I
wanted to accomplish but never knew *how.*
For a while now I have been in a relationship with a wonderful
woman, a
widow with two children. A few weeks ago we decided to take the next step
and move in together. I adore her children and they are very excited about
this, but I was curious as to what conflicts might come up and what I could
do to help them ease into their new life. That's when I came across the
articles you wrote on sfhelp.org.
Immediately diving into
a lot of things started making
sense
to me. I noticed that I have often felt
sometimes unable to
figure out how I really felt about a person or situation. Some-times I
argue with myself. Sometimes I am fairly self confident, other times
insecure. Sometimes I am happy and outgoing, and sometimes I am
irritable and want to be left alone.
I've realized I am this way for a
while, but had never been able to make sense of it. Over the past year I
have done a lot of meditation, self analysis, and observations through
which I have learned a great deal about myself, but never figured out
what to do about it, which was very
The concept of
Internal Family Systems (IFS) is the only thing I have
come
across which accurately explains the way I feel and act and gives a
concrete technique I can use to work on my problems. Already I have
found that it is much easier to gain insight into why I feel certain
ways by asking the responsible parts.
Before I would just sit there and
wonder with no idea what was really going on. By simply asking and
listening for an answer, I can actually accomplish things! I have a lot
of work to do, but your articles have given me hope that things can get
better and I can learn to change.
A few weeks ago was the anniversary of my girlfriend's former
marriage,
her husband committed
last year and needless to say this was a
difficult day for her. As we were talking about it, I used some
with a few guiding
questions to find out what she
was thinking and feeling. We talked about her
how
she sometimes got mad at herself for not being able to get over his
death, and how she sometimes felt
because she failed him. It
became pretty clear that she had conflicting feelings about his death
and I decided it was time to share the IFS ideas with her. She was
intrigued and wanted to know more.
I have ordered your
book and we
have decided to both read it and discuss
how it applies to our lives and our relationship. So not only does this
have the potential to help my life, but also to help her
and promote a happier life for us
together, as well as her kids.
The potential this has to
improve my life, and the lives of those I care
about is wonderful. Thank you again for the research you have done
and
making that infor-mation freely available to everyone."
- Name withheld by request
+++
Here's another personal reaction to the Inner Family
Systems (IFS) approach to wound-healing ("parts work"). This
was a follow-up to a brief, unsolicited affirmation of IFS
after the author scanned "Lesson 1" in this Web site. - PKG
"IFS helped me to get to the core of myself. Instead of
feeling, or rather believing, that I was the anger or fear,
victimized child, or the cold protective person that I had
felt much of my life, I realized that underneath all of
those feelings I was a confident, creative, strong,
centered, calm individual. Certainly I did have those
feeling of anger, victimization, and alienating protection,
but they no longer defined who I was or limited my life.
I could identify them when
I felt them and determine if they were truly relevant for
the current situ-ation or were they remnants of the past? I
could speak FOR these feelings, not FROM these feelings.
IFS is client centered/driven. With the help of the
therapist, I was able to free myself.
Through the process
of unburdening, I freed myself from old beliefs, feelings,
and baggage. I could now run my life instead of the deep
feelings running my life for me. I wish that this mode of
therapy/ healing was more well known and available to
everyone. It is such a gentle, respectful way to heal and
move forward in life." - Michelle M., Seattle, WA
+ + +
This is one viewer's response to a slide presentation on personality subselves
(now an
article):
Hi: this book (Who's Really Running Your Life?) has to be
made available to adults suffering from the effects of a
troubled upbringing. As one who has suffered virtually all
of my life from the effects of my upbringing, I could not
understand how it could still be affecting me at 48 years
old. I have read so many self-help books and was really
starting to wonder, "What is my problem?" Yes - I had
terrible parents in many respects. Even so, how could I
explain the constant inertia and relentless conflict within
me every time I wanted to take some action?
While researching on the internet, I stumbled on the slides
related to your book. When I read about the
personality subself) and the
something just
clicked - you explained exactly what is going on inside my
mind. Nobody else has explained how the mind works to
protect itself. That is so much like me.
This book is needed
by chronically troubled adults who experience recurring
problems such as weight issues or clutter problems. You need
to provide this info to people who are procrastinating or
doing some other behaviors ironically as a protective
measure. Maybe now, I have a real place to work from so I
can heal. I will be buying your book. Thank you.
One more thing, I just read about your background. It was a
surprise to hear that you were an engi-neer before, and that
you were brought up in a troubled home too. But as a person
who works with engi-neers, it explains why you have been able
to break down what is really going on in one's mind in a
very effective and useful way. Leave it to an engineer to
figure out the best way to get something done! Thanks again.
- Anonymous
+ + +
For a variety of materials explaining and illustrating the IFS
concept and wound-recovery,
see
http://www.selfleadership.org/
(books) and these
additional references
Prior page /
Lesson -1 links
site intro /
course outline
/
site search
/
definitions
/
chat /
contact
/
Updated
December 14, 2011
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