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All families, including yours, have an identifiable structure. It is com-posed of members + relationships + roles (who does what) + rules (how each member is "supposed to" act) + rituals + communication dynamics + physical and psychological assets + limitations + boundaries + identity. Premise - all families exist to fill their member's needs - i. e to nurture. Each family's ability to nurture effectively over time ranges from low to high. A key factor that affects a family's nurturance level is how stable and healthy its structure is in a constantly changing environment. Typical stepfamily structures are more complicated than those of intact biofamilies, because they have more people + homes + assets + complex roles + rules + merger tasks. Typical co-parents have many barriers to overcome to maintain a stable family structure and system. Average co-parents and their supporters aren't aware of this or (a) how to assess their family's structure and (b) improve it as teammates, where useful. That usually means their kids aren't learning to do these either. This is like the crew of a jet airliner not learning how to assess whether their plane is airworthy. Raise your family's nurturance level, serenity, and security by reading, discussing, and applying these articles about "mapping" your multi-home family and its structure! slides / related info / close |
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