12 Projects toward high-nurturance relationships and families

Research Summaries
Supporting Key Ideas
in this Web Site

Evidence of wounds + unawareness

By Peter K. Gerlach, MSW

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The Web address of this article is http://sfhelp.org/research/index.htm

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        From 28 years' clinical observation and research, this nonprofit Web site proposes some controver-sial ideas about people, families, wholistic health, and our society. These ideas differs from "conventional wisdom," so a normal reaction to them is skepticism. Briefly, the key ideas are that...

  • normal personalities (like yours) are composed of semi-autonomous subselves or "parts." Many international clinicians have published books to explain and validate this premise, yet the public is largely unaware of (denies) it.

  • our "inner families" of subselves can be directed by a wise true Self or a well-meaning  false self;

  • typical kids raised in a low-nurturance environment develop up to six significant psychological (false self) wounds which will degrade their health, relationships, lifestyle, and longevity;

  • unaware, wounded people unconsciously choose each other as mates - repeatedly. This causes (a) our unremarked divorce epidemic, and (b) passes wounds and ignorance on to their descen-dents.

  • typical adults - including many human-services professionals - are unaware of (a) themselves, each other, and (b) up to seven vital topics. This lowers their family's nurturance level and stresses persons, relationships, and society;

  • Most Americans (and others?) are unaware of seven skills required to think, communicate, and problem-solve effectively. This promotes frustration and conflict on many social levels. To validate this premise, get undistracted and try this self-assessment quiz.

  • many personal and relation ship problems are promoted by incomplete or blocked grief. Most Americans are unaware of healthy three-level grieving and how to create "pro-grief" homes and families. Test this premise by getting undistracted and taking this "good grief" quiz;

  • most human "mental" (psychological) and physical "illness," family "dysfunction," stress, and "relationship problems" are caused by the effects an unseen, inherited cycle of [false-self wounds + unawareness]. These can be greatly reduced, once understood and accepted;

  • Widespread evidence of the effects of the cycle include epidemic self neglect, and obesity, eating and mood "disorders," addictions, sleep deprivation, personal bankruptcies, divorce, gangs, sui-cide, bulging jails and welfare rolls, and homelessness. Our unaware media, policy makers, and most  researchers  focus on reducing these surface problems, not their primary cause - the self-amplifying [wounds + unawareness] cycle. 

        Notice your reaction to individual premises and all of them together. Visitors' email feedback and online polls in this Web site indicate general agreement with the premises among English-speakers. 

        Please let me know your reaction to these proposals about you and all of us > > >

        The independent research summar-ies below (a) validate many of these pre-mises, and (b) demonstrate the current in-ability of researchers and the media to back away from individual symptoms of the cycle, and see the whole multi-decade cycle as it expands in our society and weakens it.

 

        This nonprofit educational Web site is dedicated to (a) raising public awareness of the above and (b) motivating visitors to break the toxic cycle of [wounds and unawareness] in their families, commu-nities, and society. Your feedback is welcome!

Research Summaries

        These independent studies support the premise that the unseen [wounds + unawareness] cycle is degrading the wholistic health of typical families and societies. I'll add more summaries as I find them. If you know a study you feel is relevant, please let me know.

Project 1 - Prevent, Identify, and Reduce False-self Wounds

Project 5 - Evolve a Pro-grief Family

Project 8 - Nurture Your Primary Relationship

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        Pause and notice what your subselves are saying now. Did you get what you needed from reading this article? If not, what do you need? Who's answering these questions - your wise true Self, or "someone else"?

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Updated  May 16, 2008